Onward (2020)

There was a time, not long ago, that we had analog clocks.  You had to look at a round surface and do math based on two pointy things to figure out what time it was.  Now, we have digital clocks.  You just read the numbers and know what time it is.  It’s much easier.  There are those among us that would prefer not to do away with the analog clocks, though.  (I believe the technical term is Luddite.  Here’s your sundial.  Now go away.)

Ian and Barley Lightfoot are elves who live in a world once ruled by magic.  Magic was difficult to use and was limited to a select few.  When easier alternatives came along, magic slowly faded away.  Candles were easier and more accessible than lighting spells, for instance.  So, why pay someone else to try something that’s less reliable?

On Ian’s 16^th birthday, he gets a gift from his deceased father.  Wilden Lightfoot left a magical staff and gem for his sons when they got old enough.  Wilden knew that he was dying, so he wrote a spell so that he might see how his sons turned out.

Barley tries to cast the spell with no luck whatsoever.  When Ian tries, the magic happens.  In all the excitement, something happens and the spell only works halfway.  The brothers get their father from the waist down.  This leads to the brothers sharing an epic adventure in the hopes of finding a replacement gem.

Some of the movie comes across as cliché.  The brothers are polar opposites, with Barley being outgoing and boisterous and Ian being more quiet and reserved.  (Barley wants to play his historically accurate RPG while Ian just wants to eat his breakfast in peace.)

Their overprotective mother has a new boyfriend that neither one really likes.  Oh, and he’s a centaur police officer named Colt Bronco.  So, yeah.  It does go for a few corny jokes.

It’s enjoyable, even if it is somewhat formulaic.  It’s the kind of thing you could watch with your family now that everyone has to quarantine themselves, except that this was just released in theaters.  (There’s talk of making movies immediately available for streaming or download, but you might have to pay a premium for it.)

Speaking of COVID-19, this is probably going to be the last movie I see in theaters for a while.  It’s not the worst title to use a sendoff, but I had a few that I was looking forward to seeing.  AMC has shut down theaters, but it looks like they’ll pause A-List for the time being.  It looks like I may be reviewing a lot of Star Trek and B movies for a while.

IMDb page

 

Dolittle (2020)

There seem to be a lot of movies lately that are meant to test the waters.  Maybe they’re setting up a TV show.  There might be a sequel planned.  It could be that the movie is an expensive advertisements for toys or dolls.  I don’t think this movie fits into any of those categories.  I think that somewhere along the line, someone had to say to an actor, “Yeah… I know.  I know… But you have one more movie in your contract.”

The story of Dr. Dolittle is fairly well known, even if it’s on a basic level.  It’s about a doctor that can talk to animals.  In this instance, Dr. John Dolittle and his wife are given a plot of land by Queen Victoria.  The two live there and treat all manner of animals until his wife dies.

The story begins years later when Tommy Stubbins accidentally shoots a squirrel.  Polly, a rather intelligent parrot, leads Tommy to Dolittle’s property, where he meets Carmel Laniado.  Carmel has been sent by Queen Victoria to summon Dolittle, as she’s fallen ill.

Carmel and Tommy find the house in disarray.  Dolittle has given up doing much of anything since the death of his wife.  He becomes motivated again when Carmel informs him that the property reverts to the Crown upon the death of The Queen.

So, Dolittle, Tommy and several animals have to find a book that contains the location of a magical fruit that can cure The Queen.  Of course, they’ll have setbacks and save her just in time.  Of course, what else would you expect from a family-friendly story that’s been done already?

“Done already” about sums it up.  There wasn’t anything particularly new or interesting in the movie.  It was sort of like someone took a pilot episode for a TV series and decided to make into a movie without really changing the script.

There’s very little character development and what development there is comes in very small increments.  Dolittle is a recluse who sort of learns to deal with people again after being nudged in that direction.  Chee-Chee is a scared gorilla that eventually manages to find some courage at exactly the right moment.

There’s not a lot of major violence.  In fact, when the squirrel is shot, I don’t remember seeing a lot of blood.  It might have been there, but I honestly don’t recall seeing any.  There are a few tense scenes, but everyone comes out all right.  It’s about as PG as I’ve seen in recent years.

I remember someone talking about the Sears/K-Mart merger, saying that you can’t combine two mediocre companies and get a better company out of it.  You’re just going to get a larger mediocre company out of it.  I find that this is the case with this movie.

I like Robert Downey, Jr.  I like a lot of the actors who voice the animals.  Everything about the movie is adequate.  I just don’t think that there are too many inspired elements to the movie.  It’s like someone was going to great pains to hit the all the marks exactly.  Nothing spectacular.  It’s like the goal was to make the most basic adaptation possible.  This is exactly the kind of movie you might show in middle school or high school if there’s a free day and you need something rather vanilla.

IMDb page

 

The Shape of Water (2017)

My mother and I were talking about Trading Places shortly after she had watched it.  She was wondering if the use of a derogatory term by one of the Duke Brothers was called for.  I felt it was, as they weren’t really meant to be sympathetic characters.  They were the antagonists and nothing else.

In The Shape of Water, Richard Strickland fills that role.  He’s a racist, misogynistic creep who happens to be in authority.  The movie is set in the 1960s and he seems to represent everything about that decade that humanity should have overcome by now.  This shows in his interactions with the other main characters.

When he first encounters Elisa and Zelda, two female janitors, he doesn’t seem to mind them watching him urinate.  This is after they complained that men can’t hit the broad side of a urinal.  (I guess aim doesn’t make you a good person.)  He also leaves his cattle prod in plain view, mentioning how dangerous it is.  (Compensate much?)  He also prefers to wash his hands before doing his business.  (Who even does that?)

It doesn’t take long for The Asset to arrive.  What the main characters call The Asset, IMDb has listed as Amphibian Man.  He was captured in South America and brought to Baltimore to be studied.  Amphibian Man is kept locked up with Elisa and Zelda going in to clean the room as needed.  When it becomes apparent that Amphibian Man will be killed, Elisa knows she has to free him no matter the risk.

This is the movie that Bright could have been.  Instead of using the fantasy element as just another aspect of the movie, we have the fantasy element worked subtly into the plot.  A creature is brought in for study and is treated like crap.  I would normally complain about the character being called The Asset, but that’s exactly what I’d expect.  If you’re going to a vivisection, you don’t want to get too attached to the organism in question.

Strickland is a results-oriented guy.  That’s why he was brought in on the project.  However, many of the characters are minorities.  Elisa is mute.  Zelda is African-American.  Elisa’s neighbor is gay.  There’s even a Soviet spy mixed in.  These are not people that were welcomed with open arms in 1960s America, which breeds a certain level of empathy for Amphibian Man.  How we treat others, especially those not like us, says a lot about who we are.  This is where Strickland comes across as pure antagonist.

It’s worth noting that the movie doesn’t hold any punches when it comes to minorities.  A couple is turned away from a restaurant because people of color simply didn’t sit at the counter.  Strickland talks down to Zelda and Elisa with open hostility.  He’s also not afraid to torture Amphibian Man (and others) to get what he wants.  (For parents thinking of bringing their children to the movie, these aren’t the only issues.  There is sexuality and language.  I would say that 18+ should be safe.  13-17 is maybe a judgment call.  12 and other should probably wait.)

IMDb page

Hidden Figures (2016)

A lot of things happened before I was born.  I’ve always known small computers that could do calculations at a rate impossible for a human.  Before iPhones, there were machines that would fill a room.  Before those machines were human calculators like Katherine G. Johnson.  She, along with Dorothy Vaughan and Mary Jackson, worked for NASA when NASA was trying to put a man in orbit.

Everyone knows John Glenn.  He’s the man that America put into orbit.  Not everyone knows the team that put them there.  There were buildings of scientists trying to figure out the math necessary to not only put John Glen in orbit, but get him back safely.

There was a very narrow window with which they had to work.  Too steep and angle and he’d burn up on reentry.  If his descent was too gradual, he’d bounce off the atmosphere and go back into space.  There was also the issue of making sure he landed in the ocean.  Given the magnitude of what they were doing, the smallest of errors could be catastrophic.  This is assuming they can even figure out the math necessary to do the calculations in the first place.

Being that the movie is based on historical events, I’m not ruining anything by stating that John Glenn completes his mission safely.  Being that it’s a movie, I don’t think I’m giving away anything by stating that some liberties were taken.  Yes, Glenn specifically requested that Johnson be the one to verify the computer’s calculations.  Word is, though, that this was actually done well before his mission.  You don’t risk someone’s life like that unless you’re certain.

The movie isn’t so much about the history that everyone knows.  It’s about the people that never really got the credit that they deserved.  Johnson was both a woman and a person of color when culture didn’t favor either.  It still doesn’t necessarily favor either, but the movie shows Johnson having to run to a separate building to use the ladies’ room.

Jackson wanted to become an engineer, but had to go to court just to be allowed to take the courses necessary to even be considered.  Likewise, Vaughn was trying to become a supervisor.  She was already doing the work of a title that she was repeatedly denied.  She also saw the writing on the wall when the IBM computers were being installed.  She took it upon herself to learn FORTRAN for the job security.  (She also took it upon herself to get the machines working.)

All three women have to go above and beyond just to get noticed.  They are all fortunate to have superiors that eventually listen to reason, or at least recognize that the women are correct.  Vaughn might not have been taken seriously had she not actually gotten the computers to actually work.

The movie, like the women, walked a tight rope.  In several scenes, they have to curtail their anger.  Instead of getting mad, they get better.  There are moments when they’re told no, but they’re also eventually told yes.  They do make permanent progress, not only for themselves, but for others.  The one scene that may best exemplify this is Jackson telling a judge that she wants to be the first female engineer, just as he was first in a lot of respects.  The judge is impressed enough to grant her request.

I’d recommend watching it if only to learn who the people were.  I find it odd that it took more than fifty years for a movie to be made about this.  The Apollo and Gemini missions have been shown in film.  Those instances have usually focused on the people who went up into space.  There’s so much more to the story.

IMDb page