Back to the Future Part III (1990)

It took me a while to get going on the reviews for the Back to the Future trilogy.  Yes, I know that they came out over 30 years ago.  The first one was such an iconic movie that I wasn’t sure how to handle it.  The trilogy was also a bit of an anomaly to me in that it formed a continuous narrative, despite the fact that the second and third movies weren’t planned.  (It’s been noted that the second picks up where the first left off and this one picks up where the second left off.)

Part III goes in a new direction, taking us to the Old West.  It turns out that Doc was stranded in 1885, 70 years prior to the end of Part II.  (I’m not sure what it is with multiples of five.)   He writes Marty a note, to be delivered by Western Union, a few minutes after his disappearance.  Doc instructs Marty to find the Doc of 1955 so that they might repair the DeLorean and return Marty to 1985 once again.

Things aren’t that simple, though.  While retrieving the car, Marty and Doc discover a tombstone with Doc’s name on it.  He’s to die about a week after writing the letter.  So, a new plan is hatched:  Send Marty to 1885 to save Doc without altering the timeline.  Only, the fuel line is punctured, rendering the car inoperative.  The Flux Capacitor still works, but Mr. Fusion can’t power the car and there won’t be a gas station in town for quite some time.  So, it’s just a matter of figuring out a way to push the car to 88 MPH while keeping Doc alive for a week.  What could go wrong?

As much as I might hope for a Part IV, this is a fitting end for the franchise.  Everyone ends up happy and realizing that fate is what you make of it.  You just have to do so responsibly.  Yes, I know that there’s a TV show.  If I can find it on DVD, I might get around to watching it.  (I’ll have to see if the library has it.)

It was nice that there was a shift in the story to include Doc.  He even gets a love interest, which could complicate things.  I always felt sad when I saw the end of the movie.  Marty was stuck in 1985 while Doc got to go exploring time.  I suppose it’s possible that at some point in the future, Doc will meet Marty again.  (I’m assuming that this is what the TV series is about.)

Back to the Future seems to be a franchise that people either love or ignore.  I’ve always loved it, mostly because of its simplicity.  I’m sure that the movie’s representation of the Old West is simplistic, but it’s serving as a backdrop.  It’s more the setting for the story in which both main characters a great conclusion.  Marty McFly finally seems to learn his lesson and stops letting people push him around.  Also, Doc seems to be a happier person.  He has a family and the time machine that he originally wanted.  Both seem to have realized what’s important:  Life is what you make of it.

IMDb page

Gremlins (1984)

WARNING:  This movie gives away some details.  I don’t feel that they’ll ruin the movie-going experience, but not everyone might agree.



There was one scene I remember from Gremlins more than any other from that movie.  Kate Beringer (the love interest) is telling Billy about how her father died on Christmas.  She even goes into detail about how he was found a few days later, ruining the holiday for her.  Apparently, there was some controversy when the movie was first released, but it encapsulates the feel of the movie pretty well.  What can be joyous for many can be horrible for a few.  We’re not even talking alone for the holidays horrible.  Christmas is about to get very scary for one small town.

The movie starts with Randall Peltzer looking for the perfect gift for his son.  He finds it in a gift shop in Chinatown.  Alas, the furry little creature, called a mogwai, is not for sale.  Mr. Peltzer manages to get the shop owner’s grandson to sneak the mogwai out the back for a few bills.

There are three rules that the shop owner imparted to Randall.  First, no bright lights.  Sunlight can even kill them.  Second, don’t get them wet.  Third, do not, under any circumstances, feed them after midnight.  The mogwai comes to be known as Gizmo.

Billy is somewhat careful about the first rule.  Gizmo reacts to almost any light, so Billy is always being reminded to be careful.  It doesn’t take long before the second rule is broken.  Billy’s friend spills some water on Gizmo, causing Gizmo great pain.  A few second later, five hairballs pop off, with each forming a new mogwai.  If Gizmo is a well-behaved angel, the five new mogwai are those demon-spawn children you come across every so often.  They always want attention and are harassing Gizmo whenever the get a chance.  It isn’t long before they trick Billy into feeding them after midnight.

Billy’s mother is able to kill four of them, but the group’s leader, named Stripe, manages to escape.  Stripe manages to find his way to the local YMCA where he finds a pool filled with water.  Now, Stripe has an entire army of little troublemakers to help him wreak havoc on Kingston Falls.  They take over a bar, where they drink and smoke and make trouble for Billy’s girlfriend, Kate.  They eventually gather in a movie theater to watch Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, thus leading (hopefully) to Billy’s endgame.  If you know anything about comedies or horror movies, you know it can’t be that simple.

There are several clichés in the movie, although I’m not sure if they were intentional or not.  The most obvious, of course, is the disregard for rules.  Given some of the dialogue, this is commentary on the human tendency to want to be defiant.  Tell someone not to do something, and they’ll have an uncontrollable urge to do it.  There’s also the tendency to have one of a group of antagonists escape and cause more trouble.  Stripe does this twice.  I’ll admit that there was a larger group of Gremlins the second time; it was impressive that Billy managed to get as many as he did.  Still, why always one?

I’ve always found it odd that timing is always so precise.  You can’t feed a Gremlin after midnight.  What if your clock is off?  Am I supposed to take time zones into account?  If Mogwai predate modern timekeeping, how did people know exactly when to stop feeding them?  For that matter, when can you start feeding them again?  Isn’t it really always after midnight?

It’s also strange that they reproduce by getting water on them.  How did a species evolve like that?  For that matter, when a little fur ball pops off, how do we get the sudden increase in mass?  Where does the extra matter come from?  Also, are we to assume that the water is consumed?  When Stripe enters the pool, could we have ended up with an infinite number of Gremlins?

I suppose that might not have been a bad thing, plot wise.  The Gremlins are the main draw here. The humans are mostly caricatures.  You have the hopeless inventor for a father.  There’s the well-meaning kid.  There’s even the mean old lady who threatens to have Billy’s dog put down.

This is not a movie for young kids.  It was part of the first batch of movies to get a PG-13 rating because it was worse than PG, but not quite R territory.  Much of the proposed violence was taken out, but it’s still pretty scary.  I could see some of it giving small children nightmares.  (Consider the story I led with.)

The movie is a solid horror movie.  I imagine a few people, like myself, will watch it because it’s a classic.  If you haven’t seen it before, you might want to watch it anyway.  The effects are pretty good and the storyline, such as it is, works.  I don’t remember much of the sequel, but word is that a third installment is in the works.  It’s supposed to be a continuation of the same storyline rather than a reboot, so you might want to head over to Netflix while you can get streaming.

IMDb page

Cherry 2000 (1987)

Note:  This review was originally posted to my Epinions account.

 

Warning:  I’m going to give out major details about this movie, including the ending.  If you don’t like spoilers, this isn’t a good review to read before seeing the movie.

In my review of Dune, I started by saying that there were three kinds of movies.  You have movies that are easy to understand, movies that require some explanation, and those where no amount of explanation will help.  This is the third kind of movie.

The movie starts off with a man and what appears to be a woman.   They’re having dinner, although she’s not eating.  After dinner, it turns into a Viagra commercial with the two of them getting busy on the kitchen floor.  I don’t know if it’s carelessness or if the dishwasher is jealous, but the dishwasher overflows and shorts out the woman.  Yes, she’s a sexbot known as the Cherry 2000.

The man’s name is Sam Treadwell.  He takes the Cherry 2000 in to be repaired, but that’s an impossibility.  They haven’t made that model in quite a while, so getting parts is out of the question.  Even replacing her outright is going to be difficult.  On the mechanic’s advice, Sam takes her memory chip and sets off to find a tracker.  The tracker should be able to take him in to The Zone to find an abandoned sexbot factory.

Sam finds and hires Edith Johnson, played by Melanie Griffith.  They have to travel a great distance into The Zone, which is inhabited by lawless hooligans that will shoot at you if you come into their territory.  (No one ever said that getting to or inside the warehouse was going to be easy.)   Edith hooks up with Six-Fingered Jake, who happens to be Edith’s uncle or father or something.  He was said to be dead, but he really just wanted out of the business.  He’s now in to selling toasters.

When they set off to find the factory, they’re attacked.  Sam is taken by the group of local crazies led by Lester.  Sam is told that Edith and Jake are dead, but they were able to tow Edith’s car in.  Sam’s ex, Ginger, is there.  (You don’t understand… She changed her name.  Don’t worry; I don’t understand, either.)  The locals live in what appears to be an abandoned motel or something.  Another thing:  Lester apparently really hates trackers.  He hates them so much that when he discovers that they have one among them, he puts the tracker up against a wall and shoots him with an arrow.

The big form of entertainment with them is the Hokey Pokey.  I have no idea why they do this.  Maybe this was the Most Annoying Song in the World before the Macarena became popular.  I guess that really is what it’s all about.  The group allows Sam to stay, but Sam doesn’t want to stay.  He wants his beloved Cherry back.  Lester mentions having several units, but lacks the chip to make them work.  I don’t know if he’s serious or if he’s just testing Sam.  Either way, Sam decides to torch the place and run when he discovers that Edith and Jake aren’t really dead.

Before they can get to the factory, they meet up with some old friends of Jake and Edith.  Like many old friends in a dystopian future, one of them sells the trio out to Lester, who’s now really out for blood.  Sam and Edith are able to escape by plane, but poor Jake is shot in the back.

Sam and Edith finally find the factory.  Somehow, Edith knows exactly where the factory is, how to get into the factory and where in the factory the sexbots are kept.  It takes a few minutes for Sam to find the exact model he needs.  This is just enough time for Lester and his cronies to show up.  Oh, and Ginger is there, too.  She brought sandwiches.

Sam finds the correct model, inserts the memory chip and is happy to see his Cherry returned to him as if nothing happened.  As they escape, Sam begins to realize what a ditz the Cherry 2000 is.  He thought he knew what love was, but would rather have Edith.  Sam starts to leave with Cherry, but comes back for Edith so that they can ride off into the sunset together.

This is one of those movies that you’ll be left wondering what the f__k just happened, even if you’re paying attention.  I’m really wondering if the writers were using LSD.  The Hokey Pokey scene is just so strange that they had to be on something.

Also, sex is apparently heavily litigated.  When you go into a bar for casual sex, you apparently need a contract and a lawyer to look it over.  (Look out for Laurence Fishburne in this scene.  If you blink, you’ll miss him.)  I’ve heard of being screwed over by lawyers, but this is a bit extreme. The fact that you’d need an oral clause should tell you something.  Between this and Ginger, I can see why Sam is dead set on finding a new Cherry 2000.

It always bothers me when a piece of well-crafted machinery breaks down so easily.  You have a female-looking robot who I’m assuming was made to resemble a woman in every detail.  The Cherry 2000 was supposed to be very good -- they just don’t make them like that any more.  So, why is it that she was done in by soapy water?  Even if this were a possibility, why would someone who loves said robot be so careless as to ignore the dishwasher?  You’d think that Sam would realize that Cherry’s about to bite the dust and do something to save her.  I know that this is why we have a movie in the first place, but he could have made an effort.

Speaking of reasons why we have a movie, why is it that the item in question is always so hard to get?  Either it’s in a remote part of the country that has roving bands of rabid idiots or it’s heavily guarded in Fort Knox.  If it seems easy, that’s because the target item isn’t really there.  It was moved someplace or destroyed.  It’s never that easy.

This is a hard movie to recommend.  It’s not at all good.  It looked to me like the producers had to remove entire scenes to make the movie come in under time and/or budget, giving it a rushed and disjointed feeling.  However, it’s not so bad that I’d recommend watching it to see how bad it is.  Yes, it’s listed on badmovies.org.  Yes, it deserves to be listed there.  I’m just not sure I can recommend wasting your time on it.  This truly is a movie that will leave you wondering why.

IMDb page

Cherry 2000 Trailer (1987)