It seemed like my computer was always
just good enough to play the latest version of Grand Theft Auto. When I got GTA: San Andreas, it would just
barely run. I didn’t mind so much until
my computer crashed and I had to reformat.
I gave up until just recently when I got a new laptop. With the onset of COVID-19, I decided to take
it upon myself to delve into the fictionalized version of Southern California
once again.
The story revolves around Carl “CJ”
Johnson. He’s returned from Liberty City
for his mother’s funeral. His siblings,
Sean and Kendl, still live in Los Santos.
There is some animosity because Carl hasn’t been there. The real problems come from the gangs and
corrupt police. Officers Tenpenny and
Pulaski harass Carl. Most gangs will attack
Carl just because he’s a member of Grove Street Families.
As with previous entries into the GTA
franchise, you assume the role of Carl.
There are about 100 missions for you to go through. The first few missions deal with game play
and game mechanics. In one, you’re show
how to spray over the tags of rival gangs.
Spraying over all the tags isn’t important for the main storyline, but
doing all 100 tags does have its benefits.
Each set of missions comes from a
character. As you finish most of the missions,
a new set will open up for you. Each set
has to be completed in order, but if you have several sets going at the same
time you can alternate. If you get
frustrated with one, try another.
There’s no penalty for failing a mission unless you die or get
arrested. If that’s the case, you’ll
lose your weapons and a small amount of money.
There are also side missions, such as
the aforementioned tags. There are 100
of them for you to find in Los Santos, as well as 50 pictures to take in San
Fierro, 50 horseshoes in Las Venturas and 50 clams underwater scattered
throughout the whole map. Each one comes
with a bonus if you complete all of them.
There are also fire trucks you can use to put out fires, police vehicles
for vigilante missions and taxis for collecting fares. Again, each has a benefit for
completion. (If you go through all
twelve levels of putting out fires, you become fireproof.)
If that’s not enough, you can play pool
or basketball. There are also races for
you to compete in. And, if you like, you
can even go to one of two casinos to gamble.
I have to admit that the gambling isn’t as fun as the real thing. Not only can you not take it with you, but
the rules are simplified. There are
certain bets you can’t make in the in-game roulette and a blackjack only pays
as a normal win.
Most of the missions are pretty
straightforward. You may not get a lot
of them on the first try, but you will learn how to do it pretty quickly. The only exception to this is the Learning to
Fly mission. You may have come here
hoping for some pointers on how to complete the third and fourth lessons, where
you have to go through the coronas. I’m
sorry. I can’t help you.
The best I can tell you is to adjust
course a little bit at a time, but even that only helps a little. If you miss a corona, it’s easier to crash
and start over. (As long as you don’t
crash into the water, you just have to press space bar to restart the lesson.) It took me months of playing on and off to
finally complete them.
The good news is that Toreno will stop
calling you after the third phone call.
This means that you can go and try something else. I was able to complete all of the tags, all
of the photographs and get the car dealership before completing the third
lesson. It’s going to be long and
hard. I thought of quitting several
times, but I did finish them. You just
have to keep at it.
At least the play area at that point was
vast. I had the entire play area open to
me, meaning I could explore everything.
There are a lot of little towns and forests you can go through. There are a lot of weapons. You can even get a dildo and a vibrator,
although not at the same time. (Weapons
have slots and you can only have one of each type at a time.) I do recommend getting the minigun. That was a fun weapon.
Once I did get past the flying lessons,
it was smooth sailing to the end of the game.
At that point, I was so invested that I was kind of sad that I wouldn’t
be seeing the other characters again.
(Actually, that’s not entirely accurate.
I still have a few optional missions I can play.) I don’t think I’ll ever look at a plane the
same way. I can fly them, but it’s
generally easier for me to jump out and use the parachute than to land the
plane unless I have to.
My stats show that I have 90 hours of
game play, but that’s somewhat deceptive.
There were a few times I reloaded a game to save my weapons. I don’t know if any time was lost. Through dating of some girlfriends, you can
keep your weapons after dying or being arrested. Once this happens, reloading becomes more a
matter of convenience. Some mission sets
are near enough to a save point that I usually just reloaded so that I didn’t
have to go all the way back.
I should note that you’re given only a
few save points. You start out with the
Johnson Family house, for instance. You
can buy other properties to use as a safe house, which will prove beneficial
later in the game. It gets tedious to
have to travel back one of a few save points.
They do cost in-game money, but you should have plenty by the time it
becomes necessary. (If you need money,
this is another reason to do the fire missions.
Those pay relatively well.)
Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas ended up
being a big improvement over Vice City.
Aside from the huge play area, it was a lot more complex. You had to exercise and worry about your
fitness. You could get haircuts and
tattoos. Some of these could even be
used to evade police. At its core, it’s
still Grand Theft Auto. While the
Learning to Fly mission did take its toll, I might look into Grand Theft Auto
IV if I can get some extra money together.
I’d like to see what kind of progress they made with that.
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