Saturday, February 03, 2018

Friday the 13th: The Series -- Season 1 Episode 3 (Cupid's Quiver)

Lots of great things happened in the 1980s.  Back to the Future was released.  Star Trek: The Next Generation premiered.  Rubik’s Cube started the decade.  It was a pretty awesome decade.

There were a few not-so-great things that happened, too.  We had Friday the 13th: The Series to end the decade with.  It premiered in 1987 and started with some less-than-stellar episodes, such as Cupid’s Quiver.

This is the third episode of a series about Micki and Ryan, two cousins who inherit an antiques store and its cursed items.  With the help of their dead uncle’s former business partner, Jack, they’ve been retrieving those cursed items, like an ugly statue of Cupid.  How is this item cursed?  It allows the owner to make the target of his affection desire nothing else than to be with them.  Then, the owner kills the target.

The episode opens at a bar.  We have a guy being rejected by a woman, who happens to be on a date with another guy.  After she repeatedly tells him to get lost, he positions the statue and allows it to fire a small energy bolt at her.  After the pain subsides, she suddenly desires him.  It’s a shame, because her date seemed like a nice guy.

Well, the guy with the statue takes the woman to a hotel room upstairs, where they start making out.  That is, until he starts to kill her.  Just then, a group of fraternity brothers break into the room and take the statue.  It’s not clear what happens to the man or the woman.

Back at the frat house, the statue is noticed by Eddie Monroe, fellow member of the fraternity.  And by member, Eddie really means that he’s the janitor.  Anyway, that’s not going to stop him from stalking Laurie.  He gets the idea to steal the statue and use it on a random woman.  I don’t know how he knows what to do with the statue.  Then again, it is a cursed item.

He uses the statue on the random woman and takes her out in his beat-up car so they can make out.  He then leaves to relieve himself, only to return with a beehive.  At least, I assume it’s a beehive.  It might be a hornets’ net.  Either way, they sting her to death.  It’s kind of impressive that Eddie managed to walk all the way back to the car without getting stung.

It’s time for Eddie to use it on Laurie.  When Micki and Ryan try to intervene, Micki is shot with a bolt from Cupid, making her desire Eddie.  They eventually get the statue and put it in the vault beneath the store.  That doesn’t stop Ryan, the eternal horndog, from wanting to use it.  Seriously?  Like he doesn’t know how the statue works.

The only reason I watched the first four episodes is that the first DVD of the season-one set had the first four episodes.  I’m going to have to take a closer look at the second DVD before checking it out.  This one was a very confusing and poorly written episode.  It’s almost like they wrote a rough draft and just used that.  Consider the bar with the hotel above it.  What’s it called?  It’s called the Hotel Bar.  They couldn’t even come up with something lame to call it.

As I said, it’s not clear how anyone knows how to use the statue.  It’s not like it was activated accidentally.  Every time we see it used, it’s intentional.  This brings up the issue of consent, which is never mentioned.  Even if the woman suddenly wants the man, she’s under the influence of a cursed item.  It’s not really consensual.  Eddie is basically raping the women before killing them.

Also not clear is how Jack was able to get himself hired at the fraternity party as a bartender.  I don’t think it was explicitly stated whether or not he was serving alcohol, but he does appear to know how to make sodium pentothal from common household items.  That’s a pretty neat trick.

Overall, it’s a vaguely confusing story that’s not particularly good.  I’d say that it has potential, but it would take a lot of work to make this into a decent episode.  It’s one of those story ideas that was probably best left unused.

IMDb page

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