The Old Guard (2020)

Immortality seems like kind of a lame superpower.  All it means is that you can’t die.  You can still feel pain.  And what happens if it doesn’t include the replacement of lost limbs?  You could have to spend the rest of your life as just a head or something?  This doesn’t even mention the loss of all your loved ones and having to keep up with society for an eternity.  Plus, what if you gain immortality when you’re 80?  There are a lot of quality-of-life issues you’d have to contend with.

Andromache has been dealing with that for approximately 6,000 years.  She leads a small band of other immortals who fight for good causes.  It’s not necessarily anything major, but they tend to help people who go on to do something important.  The latest addition to this group is Nile Freeman, a soldier serving in Afghanistan.  So, Andy has to not only find Nile and help her out, but she has to deal with a pharmaceutical CEO names Steven Merrick.

Merrick wants to find the immortals and study them.  If he could figure out where the immortality comes from, he could sell it and make a fortune, as if he weren’t rich enough.  It would sound pretty easy, as the immortals don’t have to fear death.  However, nothing lasts forever.  And it’s not really that simple.

It’s pretty obvious that Netflix is trying to set up a franchise here.  The movie doesn’t go into too much detail about where the immortals came from.  It’s not stated that the powers are genetic or divine.  It’s also implied that maybe six or so have it at any given time.  It comes across a lot like Highlander.  Granted, a lot of the major details are different.  These immortals only fight for good and aren’t compelled to battle each other.  (It’s not even clear what effect beheading would even have.)

The ending also leaves open the possibility of another movie or even a TV series.  It might be interesting to see what that looks like, but I’m hoping that any future projects would look better than this.  The writing is a little flat and it’s not particularly fast-paced.  This wouldn’t be so bad if it were setting something up.  Andy would be on her way out and Nile would be serving as the audience’s surrogate.

A TV show could make sense.  Each episode could deal with some moral issue while at the same time building the mythology.  I would hope that Merrick wouldn’t come back, though.  He was a one-dimensional villain.  He seemed like a stock Scooby-Doo villain in some regards.  There was no dying grandmother.  He didn’t seem concerned by bettering humanity.  He was purely motivated by profit.  But, hey…Who wants to live forever, anyway?

IMDb page

Aladdin (2019)

Remakes are a tricky bunch.  There are some movies, like Back to the Future and The Princess Bride, that should never be redone.  Both movies are perfect as is.  I don’t think anyone could improve on either one.  In other cases, I can understand.  Time passes and the older version seems dated.  (It’s rare, but there are remakes that are better than the original.)  There are also characters, such as Godzilla, that audiences just can’t get enough of.

Then, there’s Aladdin.  I’ll admit that I never watched the 1992 version all the way through.  However, it would seem that this version stays pretty close to the original.  At least a few of the songs are similar.  So, that makes me wonder why a remake was deemed necessary.

I’m not going to go too much into plot here.  Most people should be aware of the basic story by now.  An orphan named Aladdin meets a princess named Jasmine.  Despite the class difference, he manages to court her with the help of a genie named Genie.  He also takes on an evil Grand Vizier who’s out for power.

This movie still seemed to be operating in cartoon mode.  For instance, the scenery seemed realistic, but there were come parts that still came off as well-rendered CGI.  The characters also seem to be one-dimensional.  (Jasmine is defined by her inability to serve as sultan.  The Genie is defined by his need to serve a master.)

Will Smith seems to have an energy similar to Robin Williams without seeming like he’s channeling Williams’s version, so there’s that.  However, I could see a lot of long-time Disney fans seeing this movie as unnecessary.  (Childhood nostalgia is a dangerous area to wander into.  One wrong move could generate a lot of backlash.)

Fortunately, the movie is pretty safe for children.  They didn‘t add anything scary.  (The PG rating comes from a few dangerous situations and action sequences.)  I’m not sure how similar the movie is.  It’s a perfectly fine movie to take the children to see this summer.  I’m just glad I was able to see it before school let out.

IMDb page